Tuesday, March 14, 2017

A true life gift

Maybe its just me but I can see so clearly that when a person rejects their gift they are rejecting God. It is when people embrace their true gift them seem to be so much more open to God moving in their life.

It was talking to a man recently who has a gift in lets call it area 1. But through disappointments and such he was wanting area 2 to be his life. He saw area 2 as a way to get back what he had lost and be somebody. In talking with this man he so obviously was not interested in anything but hearing how good he was at area 2. The mere mention of area 1 drew ire from him and it was in this I saw something so clearly.

Our gifts in life are our spiritual connection in its infancy. But if we reject our true gift then ultimately there is a complete rejection of Christ as every good gift comes down from above. The world does everything it can to limit the expression of a gift and for those who are operating in their gift it will demand it sells out. To sell out is to produce for money or produce on demand. It is creative but any who have had this pressure to sell out know it stops coming from their spirit and comes from their head knowledge. The learned gift.

So we see a world where people are following their paths for so many reasons and the first symptom of life failure is living for a reason. Money, success, recognition, reclaiming lost opportunities, serving God and the list is endless. Reasons to do things are the first symptom we are likely outside our calling. As for so many this man constantly stated he needed money to live and just could not see that money follows gifts.

What is all too common is people living their desires or what they think is their desire. They see the immediate lust of what they are able to attain and the lust blinds them to the obvious. It is a gift in itself for this individual to have a crisis that causes a change of life. Unfortunately many follow distractions that make a living for their life and when they are old enough they just don't have the energy to pick themselves up after that crisis. They acknowledge maybe they chased the wind and never had the satisfaction of following the gift.

Religion is one huge obstacle to the manifestation of a gift. It brings knowledge to a mind and empowers a head. It traps the adherent to legalistic patterns of right and wrong they more often than not have learned by rigid teaching. I have found that religious people can never surrender to a gift as religion has smothered its expression. The system has demanded each gift is exercised in the parameters of the structure and we all know you cant limit a gift. Religious people have no intimacy it is a learned intimacy more often than not and a gift resides in intimacy of the spirit. Religion steals intimacy. This is why religion of man exists to give a pseudo intimacy so like this man he refused to see and there are none so blind as those who refuse to see and none so deaf as those who refuse to hear.

In the case of this man it became so obvious in the rejection of the potential of his true ability he was closing a spiritual door. He was attempting to seal shut a spiritual beckoning as he buried the true gift in narcissistic life. Yes I could tell him how wonderful he was in his gifted area and he would accept readily the compliment and say "I know" then he would deflect it back to where he had decided he needed the attention with a life that was screaming to make it.

A gift is so limitless, so powerful that even when we box it there is still an amazing energy bursting and shining out of the box we have put it in. Unfortunately so many see the rays of creativity and spirituality and just love the comfort of the box. The love the control of the box and love the fact a bright shining gift from above now lights the box. To see the box in and of itself is a gift. Yet to surrender the box is the most amazing expression of any gift or life. As the greatest gift is life itself and to pass from life to life more abundantly there can only be continual surrender to the great creator of all.




Saturday, March 11, 2017

The foolishness of life

Layers of surrender. It seems to me our walk of salvation is a life of surrender and if the very core of who we are is not being liberated or challenged daily then likely we are not who we think we are.

It's really not possible to surrender in our own ability and I think this is perhaps the most pivotal point of salvation. We can say we surrender but how can we be free of the very thing that enslaves called me. A life of inability and fear that has been our core that is masked in success and self righteousness. How can we surrender when we don't even know what it is we must do to be right?

It was recently I was challenged of a greater depth I had never seen before or really knew existed. Sure I had seen images my imagination and spirit had envisioned but yet here I am faced with a whole different reality to what my imagination had drawn. My imagination in its desire to protect me had taken the flashes of life emanating from my spirit and drawn a scenario around it. The only problem with this was it is my imagination and imagination is not reality. So faced with the reality of what I saw, it was the glimpse of nakedness and vulnerability before my God I liked but yet I hated. It demanded a response and it was obvious in and of who I am there is and was no ability to act.


It the inability of action all I could ultimately do was say God I surrender but you will have to take that surrender and help me. I have no way of living surrender and know in reality I will go back to what I have always understood and lived. In reality I am in fear that just maybe God is not there in the way I thought He was. Just maybe he does not see me the way I hoped he did and just maybe I was on my own. Faced with this hidden part of life out of my inner man bubbled hope yet out of my immediate reality was death, fear depression and anxiety as I stared at the reality of who I could now see I am.  It just seemed easier to go back to who I have always been and lived, the issue was this was now impossible and I knew it.


Yes I can only say from my being "I surrender" but the actions beyond that I have no control over. The act of surrender was co-joined to the creator. It just needed me to agree and then God could only do the rest as how can I surrender to create a new reality when I have no idea what that is supposed to be. I cannot draw a picture  in my head or imagination of what that surrender looks like on the other side. As how can a man stop being a man? yes I can acknowledge that beyond the surrender there is no identity to fall back on. Now I must allow God to create a new reality. A new man and a new fresh day. But how do I trust this unseen God with my very life, my very core, my daily needs and expression desires and love?


How can one abandon life ? How can one expect to give into what seems a deep endless and bottomless void of faith and not panic? This is what I had now come face to face with. Faith had indeed become very individual and tailored to who I am and this was perhaps part of the issue. You see we like the crowd, we all profess individuality but in reality we are sheep who follow and have gone astray. Yet here I was with individuality screaming at me and all I wanted was someone who has been this way before I can use as a point of reference. I needed to know it was OK and I could trust this God I cannot see with my eyes. Yet the despair set in when I could see there is no such person. I was created for individual intimacy that was part of corporate responsibility. I was failing and like a man drowning in his own life I gasped for any little puff of air.


I had seen life one way and now culminating around me was the pinnacle of life through death. Yes I had thought I was dead to this world in some small way yet now I see his world was in every layer of my life. So faced with such all I could say was I surrender God, but in reality what I surrender, without you taking it I will go back to being who I have always been. But in that very act vulnerability arrived like I have never known. Can I live the life of no life? Can I cast down the imaginations of my mind I have adhered to and yes ultimately can I exist in this world while not existing. Can I struggle and have no struggle and ultimately can I abide in a new reality wanting to burst forth in my life. Something I can do nothing but say have your way oh God and out of the cry of my heart I find the surrender of me less painful.


Yes my mind cannot trust God and in reality never will be able to. If  any person can say "I trust god" they are God of their own world. What they are really saying is "I trust myself". Such a one has never surrendered the very core of who they are. Unless we see the futility of life how can surrender? Our mind has indeed just created another scenario it placed a God of some form into to create a peaceful existence to hide in and survive.

It is not that I don't think but rather that I now act by the positioning of life. My head loses its reason and my heart thinks with a new found life that is in no hurry. You see my head has spent a lifetime making sense and striving to control through understanding. It has ruled the moment, ruled the environment called "me". It had  a built in mechanism to pad everything I have done to hide reality as a means of protection. It had created its own reality of self and at its core level had made itself the master . The God of self who had ultimate power and control to do, say and be what seemed good at the time.


Yet here I am now surrendering in its entirety this life called me. The fool that I am yet the freedom I have become!














Friday, March 3, 2017

Holy Spirit creative

Was musing the spirit life again. There are so many ebbs and flows, ups and down on this path. It seems the higher the highs the lower the lows and in just rolling this around in my spirit I have a few lines of life to peel back.

Firstly in our desire to live spirit we often look for what to avoid or a place to park our brain. You know when we get so far out on the water we cant see land a boat or anything of natural comfort. Maybe panic lurks in the background and if you have ever experienced panic you know there is no ability to control actions in a panic state. But life shines through in any situation. A life that is beyond any natural ability we may have.

I remember as a child falling into the deep end of a public swimming pool. A man sat 3ft away from me and watched as I began to drown. I remember a silhouette of his face to this day perhaps 40 years later. The issue was I could swim but as panic arrived I had no ability to do anything. I clearly remember going under and fighting my way to the top only to go under again. I actually have no recollection of getting saved but I do know the life saver who pulled me out saved my life. But as I think back to this event I can see the parallel to our spirit life. We know how to swim or even float on top of life but it just takes a moment, a trivial thing, to have us drowning in a deep end of life.

Our mind what a powerful yet restricting tool. But to be life, to walk life, to let life consume us there has to be a denial an abandonment of the daily concerns. Yes it goes against every fiber of who we are yet in a spirit life we can. Our natural approach has been to try and not think about the water or look around us but to put our head down and try to not notice our predicament. In essence we are allowing our brain to make a scenario of right and wrong. We try to not think wrong but to dwell on the right. This approach works at low levels life maybe but as we get out on the water there is a new way that emerges.


Such a way causes us to abandon, rest, abide in life. When there is a flow we place our eyes on it and let it encompass everything that we are. There gets a point we have to just not see. Not by conscious choice but rather by natural spirit life.

So for example before leaving for Portugal for 11 weeks a new way of seeing life arose. It was disturbing yet it was obvious once seen it will be lived. We left for Portugal with perhaps $200 to last us for 11 weeks. We had become tired of the entrapment of finances, free of financial concern. Picture a life never being bound to finances, never knowing how much money you have or don't have. To give because it is life to give and to not give because it is life not to give. Free of a conscious decision or choice. So if it was for us to need $1000 then it will be there. We would never know having never looked at the number. Knowing that if money was needed it will be created and somehow, someone, something has taken care of it.

So we arrived not looking at the bank and for the time here have never looked at our account. Let me tell you that is not an easy thing to do naturally as amounts bind us to carnal responsibility. After arriving with around $200 known dollars we have seen life flow. Three months rent has been paid at $1250 a month. Food has been eaten, cars rented, gas put into the cars etc etc. To this end we still don't understand how. It just stands to spirit life that what is needed will be there and will be created. The freedom to live free of concern in these areas is there but when on the water the panic is only a step away. There are so many other outrageous areas attached to our journey here that we cant even begin to express the outright stupidity of our situation. Yet here we are living in a peace that goes beyond understanding.

It was in this peace we have given money away while here. It was just right to do and in so doing it is the flow of the creative. I start to see the creative has been restricted by what can only be termed as our control. We live to have some sort of control of where and what we do. But in Spirit life a freedom arrives that we just loose interest in knowing, controlling or even caring. This is such a path of abnormality it is impossible to be lived by conscious choice. The choice we made was to say "yes Lord" and after that any choice we have gets in the way of the creative flow. If we are making choices what to do, where to go, what to give, when to and how to then realistically we are God of ourselves and it can only be in the abandonment of non-life that life happens. Where non-life is our learned natural ways we have called life. But life is true spiritual creative life. Choice is a prison we choose to reside in.


In my desire I cannot live. It can only be from seeing a spiritual path I can walk. The romance of this path causes us to be like drunk men , drunk on love and oblivious to potential limitations. It is in this romance we enjoy the beauty of creation the moment of  sun bursting through our bedroom window. The place we are and the happenings of the day. Can life get any better. Now yes to desire to live such is impossible in and of itself. If I can see choice I have made religion and I am living in the grip of self imposed religion. Abandon to the life of romance from a loving God and know that no two people are alike. No two romances the same, no need to take control just abandon and allow love to consume us in every area we have learned to live. Then truly out of death comes life as the bible says.

Monday, January 9, 2017

From a reader to us all



I always knew that with no individuality at the same time there is pure individuality Can`t be explained, only revealed to us through the spiritual perspective of life.

We see how there is lots of religion around us, In the start of spirit life, that new life that began and is a constant moment daily, I think we can be effected or influenced to the religion of man in some ways but as we flow and mature in daily spiritual life, I see that there is less and less influence of the carnal among us. We can search for a better way to receive w/e Our heart desires, but a revealing of who we are we are faced with the fact that life is purity in the holy spirit.

We are destine to a place of pure joy in the holy spirit. Even when our mind thinks otherwise, There is a state of "complete" and "eternal" that stays always what it is and will be. There is no change of this love, It`s always deep, pure and a impossible love that can`t be seen by on natural eyes.

We look around us, and we just stop for a moment, patiently looking around the glory that God made, We start to see the moment`s and movement of this "eternal" state of love that is the purest form of life that the spiritual was ever formed to. Then life begins, It`s as if life has just began, We are like new borns, Finally seeing what is always there. It`s such a life that is revolutionary and so incredible that words would never come close to what it really is.

We are just being revealed moment by moment this life, so pure, So romantic and it never goes away. So many question, but so many answers. 

Friday, January 6, 2017

To reveal life in Jesus



To have spiritual promotion as a permanent state. Every living person has a pulling toward the spiritual some arrange their lives to the pulling others suppress bury and busy the call.
It is the new age that is worth a mention. Many are pulled to the spiritual inside it but fail to grasp a bigger picture. Ultimately any time a spiritual path becomes about me it is psychopathic in its outworking and will cause an individual to seek community and manifestations to bring them back to something they have experienced and yearn to be able to abide in. The new age attracts endless manifestations and people of various talents and skills coming together in pseudo community to feed each spiritual hunger. Yes they will have moments in the eternal of spiritual encounters.
Failing to see the gifts are neutral and it is dependent on the spirit they are motivated by in communion, intimacy intercourse and fellowship. The undergirding of this community are talented individuals who attract, what can only be called seekers. Ones who in many way leech off spiritual gifts to try and find spiritual peace. They are aware of the pulling but fail to grasp the purity of how to connect. They will assume any action, religion or manifestation that brings a spiritual connection of sorts and in so doing live a life of always striving but never being able to come to complete spiritual identity. Of course drugs, sex and trances will always be involved with this culture as that is the closest spiritual encounters man can control. Drugs remove the power and control of the mind. Sex brings a ,momentary spiritual connection and trancing is again the removal of mind to allow influence from usually any unclean spirit.

Terms like nirvana work their way in and encase the adherents onto a path of always striving or doing to try and BE. I guess in such a community if honest everyone is dependent on the other to get something they desire or lack. A gifted musician will have many what can only be called spiritual leeches attach themselves to the spirit in the music and in so doing pull the music the way of purpose and anything with purpose is religious or humanistic. Gifted musicians often play as an expression of their spirit yearning for permanent connection. That prayer or incense of their spirit when allowed to be smothered by psychopathic individuals leeching life will smoother the connection while providing a temporal connection of community. It limits the eternal expression to a time of use an expiry. Why I love true spiritual koinonia it only reveals life and is life and there is never individual identity in such expression of worship. Yes of course while having no individuality we have complete individuality. If you can understand that with your head you don’t get it!

It is in the pure times of no purpose the pure life of no purpose that freedom awaits and this place of intimacy can only come about through surrender. This surrender cannot be a mental ascent but rather a walking of the journey to such a point we see the creator and surrender to the almighty. It is in such a surrender life is complete and no longer is there a need to strive for spiritual fixes or highs. The state of being in one’s self is the completeness of identity in spirit.

It is at this point one goes beyond an individual gift and enters a life that is a gift. A musician for example who has had an incredible gift of music, upon surrender now is revealed life. That life becomes the music and everywhere it goes people hear a creative spiritual sound coming from such a one. The music is not limited to sound it is now a spiritual sound of freedom that creates life in all it touches. Maybe it is best called a fragrance and to some it is life, to others it is death.

An artist with paint will move beyond the immediate canvas to a life of the creator painting with them. Their life becomes the masterpiece not by striving or actions but by a state of who they are. In such a person they go beyond natural limitations and expectations. Such a one is ruined for this world and finds things happen like the thought of money and needs evaporates. They do not live on a park bench but rather in life co-joined with the spiritual father they now just live financial life. Such a one travels and lives and what is needed is just there. It is not explainable in words but for one who walks such a path it is the life of intimacy where the creator paints with their life. When they walk into places life comes to non-life and people are changed by just being near such a one. As how can change not happen when a spiritually surrendered being meets one who is trapped in humanistic endeavors spirit calls to spirit and life is revealed in all concerned.

Such a person is not living consciousness they just are the fruits of the spirit by the very nature of who they are when they co-joined to co-create. Love, joy, peace, contentment are a fragrance of life to those who are spiritually seeking and may not even know it. Funny thing is we can never know who such a seeking person is, as realistically all seek. Mankind will use the road signs of spirit manifestations to feed their orphan heart. The psychopathic soul of a person will use the creator to meet their needs and make them feel good. It is in such infancy we are amazed at the eternal love that encompasses and draws towards surrender. The Godhead is not threatened by an orphan heart that searches, uses and abuses. As the fathers heart longs for intimacy and union.

So we could say the gift that brings such joy will also bring such torment. Now while someone is living the joy of many moments they often bury the torment as they keep themselves busy with the culture they have entered and woven around their life. It is in the busyness we never have to face the torment of not knowing completeness. Yes words are meaningless and any who have seen spirit know it is in movements not words we are drawn.

Surrender and the path to surrender are the most beautiful thing. As we live non-life we are drawn to life and the grace of the creator can only be sufficient to have non-life gnaw at a life until such a one abandons life itself and in complete surrender is free from past actions, words, desires etc. In abandonment of our identity we become complete identity. This is the woven road to the eternal, mankind has been on for thousands of years. It has caused holy books to be written and man-made knowledge of the book. As in knowledge lies carnal humanistic power. But when we become the book we are the book and the book or bible is our spirit the words become meaningless and the life is who we now are. Yet so many are trapped by the words of a limitless eternal book called the bible. Funny the bible itself tells us we are the living word and that the letter kills of the bible but the spirit gives life. Yet an orphaned heart can never enter this identity it will always strive. As anything we are doing or not doing to connect in spirit is manmade religion. True spiritual union with the Godhead is a place devoid of action it is a euphoric life where actions are symptom of identity. We DO from our BE no longer do we DO to BE. Mans religion is humanistic vomit destined to detract from spiritual oneness of completion. Religion has a focus on actions and deeds but spirit goes beyond the temporal, beyond the now and is the eternal.
Such is the spirit such is………..

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Is it a marriage or a partnership?



The intersection of marriage  and religion.
I think perhaps marriage is the greatest spiritual example mankind will ever be given. It can either be a great joy as oneness or unity or it can be great pain as a partnership of works. Most of the time people spend focused on the outworkings of marriage or the fruit of it but fail to see the root of where it is and should be founded. We have marriage counselors who assist couples in dealing with the issues and themselves cannot see the very basis of marriage many times is actually based in partnership not marriage.

So what is a marriage and what is a partnership? I guess it is relatively obvious so let’s start with partnership. When two people come together and put the word marriage on their relationship. When the relationship is based in self it will always strive to have needs met. A partnership is psychopathic by the very nature of where it is grounded and any who have been the victim of a psychopath know it is certainly not fun, refreshing or full of love. All partnership fail at some point. Usually as greed and power manifest with the perception of success.

Now while the romance propels the relationship it is a beautiful thing but we find over time a marriage can descend into partnership rather rapidly. I have needs that have to be met and many have the idea in marriage it is the other persons work to meet those needs. Where once sexual areas seemed to bring together, they now seem to separate and as time goes on it becomes a labor of love or a partnership of convenience.

Marriage is a thing of beauty when allowed to develop in the holy spirit of where it is born. It is in romance we find the spiritual key to ignite marriage and have two people unite as one. Yes spiritually they can connect but if they do not allow the freshness of the spirit, they will feel a connection but their actions repel. Yes the culture we have placed ourselves in demands so much and as we submit to these demands it only serves to separate and divide intimacy. Romantic intimacy is alive when there is no agenda, no purpose. One cannot mistaken sexual areas for romance. They are an outflowing of romance but they do not generate romance or sustain romance. Without getting into this area too deeply let’s just say, when sex is based in lust it is psychopathic and destructive to romance.

True intercourse is when a man and a woman come together in a spiritual journey of life. As they merge there is no self, there is no “me” it becomes one. It becomes one action, one individual made up of two. This unit moves as one, loves as one, ignites as one, and shares passion for unification. Not for a moment but rather for a lifetime. The lifetime is in-comprehendible and is not a reason it is a symptom of love that is alive. As sexual areas descend into the desires of “me” then the marriage itself begins on its spiral downward to a partnership.

A man wants his sexual needs met and the woman wants her emotional connection and never the twain shall meet. I have often wondered why God created man and woman so vastly different in sexual areas. Then as I saw the beauty of romance with God it became clear why. Yes as marriage matures the romance deepens and strengthens. This change of pace transfers into sexual areas and many fail to move with that flow. They look back to what was and fail to live the moment and enjoy the “now”.

Not to mistaken romance for sex. As a young (not necessarily in age) man and woman we find romance involved crazy actions of being irresponsible and spontaneous. But as depth comes one must allow the life of a marriage to breathe. The original romance drew together and culminated in marriage now romance no longer draws together it is an outflow of “one”. Not to be mistaken for actions romance has become a state of being not of doing. Only as a marriage wastes time together with no purpose can they discover the true flavor of the true poetic symphony they now “BE”(as a state).

In spiritual unity the two have now become one and as one, they do not do things for each other to keep a happy marriage. To journey as one and just “be” the needs of the other are ministered to in a complete way. Needs get met, by just spending time together and savoring the completeness of who we have become. Again the culture around us demands or screams for changes. Money, kids, work, homes etc become a focus and as we convince ourselves we are being responsible we fail to see we have surrendered the out-workings of our marriage and are descending into a partnership. All partnerships fail in time!

The issue for many has been their spirits are merged down deep in their inner being but their actions divided. So when you talk to the divorced they will almost always say there is still a connection to their previous partner. The bible says it this way. “what God joins nobody can separate”. Divorcees may hate each other and never see each other but they still feel joined in some way.

Yes there is hope for marriage and as one surrenders to the spiritual romance of their life they will discover immense now passion of life. Perhaps we should say “religion steals intimacy”. Religion ultimately is man worshiping himself in humanistic systems he has fabricated to hide in and convince himself he is not about himself. Religion steals intimacy and that religion may be sports or church or business or money. As mankind walks religion he surrenders intimacy. Really the answer is simple and pure. As inside every man, woman and child there is a romantic pulling. Something birthed in their gift and usually smothered by culture. This secret place of the creative draws us to unity with God and mankind. As we first and foremost yield our identity to the spiritual drawing within then true unity comes. As we must lose our life to find it and we can only lose our life as we allow true spiritual romance to be alive in us. Not by actions but by the very nature of our deep spirit calling to deep. This is what Jesus is all about what a travesty religion makes Jesus about partnership and using him to get. Maybe why so many struggle in faith they were never married to the Godhead.

Perhaps the greatest example of a spiritual marriage that nobody can ever explain naturally is the Godhead.